You are a lazy gridiron player, and are well versed at avoiding effort or practise, instead focusing your time on the benefits of being on a football team like booze and loose women Play the game from the players perspective, convincing other people to do things for you or to let you not do things. Pretend you cant practise due to a limp from working out so heavily, or when the squad goes for a run hide round a corner when no one sees you. Hide and pretend to be someone else when the coach is looking for you. Get away with doing NOTHING. However game day is looming and your set to be playing that day, when for the first time you actually cannot play due to an injury from your "extracirricular" activity. Now apply those skills to fake it to look like you will play, suit up with extra cushioning and try to play the game without moving, try to get someone to dress like you and replace you, use your skills of pursuasion to actually prepare and play properly for a change (you lose if you do this though, come on) or try to get the game cancelled in some spectacular manner. Game is played a a 3rd person game, similar in play style to Bully

https://nz.pinterest.com/pin/411586853417413148/ (rather watch the game than play)