Journal entry 1.

I'm in a strange, transitional place in my life. I want to keep journaling. I want to record and remember. So I like to generally do this during the night, when my whole day is elapsed and I can look back and reflect.

… But maybe that won't work right now, since I'm not fantastic at habit forming when it comes to keeping a timetable.

So I'll write when the mood strikes, when there's opportunity.

I'm still anxious. I went to bed with the door propped open so Ben could hear me if I called. My phone woke me up at 5:10am. I get anxious, I call for Ben, because he's not in bed with me. It's close to the time that the man came in. I get out of bed, I don't want to be in the bedroom. Ben's there, lying on the foof, head laid back against the couch. He tells me he fell asleep there on accident.

I spend the morning a little tightly wound, skin feeling tight, body feeling like a rod.

I have Contracts today and I know that my number is up, soon. Soon. Soon. Today? I sent an e-mail telling them the situation. Rich is nice. He expresses concern, says he won't cold call me today. No contact from Levine, what a surprise. I don't feel like he's a good person.

Five minuets to go before I leave. I should keep practicing those cases because I don't know how this will pan out. Criminal Law then to a quiet coffee shop. Not my idea or hope to spend the day in the apartment alone. I have work to do anyway. A draft. I'm not great at legal writing. I'm going to get better, though.