Wrote some more about destiny.
Now, let's pretend for a moment that this first choice you make is not influenced by anything at all. Whatever would be the outcome of that decision would influence how you see the world after that and in that order also influence how you make your next decision. So we can deduct, that every decision that follows after that at any point in your life is in fact a consequence of that one first choice you made. The question is now if everything you do in your life depends on what you experienced, did or didn't do until that point, do you really have a say in your future decisions?The answer is yes. If somebody tells you what you will do, you can choose to do the exact opposite of that. What I mean when I say you can't change your future is, that I think you don't make that decision by yourself in a sense that you, your brain, the essence of your inner self - whatever that actually may be - has full control over that choice. You will make that decision because you have a certain predisposition - maybe genetically, maybe because of something you talked about with the people you grew up with, maybe because you read an article this morning. That is what I mean. You are the sum of your experiences.
This year I wrote more than in any other year before. I began by blogging daily for several reasons. First, I wanted to get better at writing. Second, I wanted to prove to myself that I can deliver on a promise, in this case to publish some text every day. Third, I wanted to get over my fear of having my writing judged by others by just don't giving a shit and publishing anyway no matter how bad it is. But it was after a month of posting that I realized I wasn't good at coming up with (good) new stuff every day, which was about the time when I found out about the streak.club.I liked that here I didn't have to publish my writing while still having this confirmation in form of the streak list, so I switched from blogging to the streak.club. Now, about 8 months after I made my first post, I would like to say goodbye for the following 2 reasons.
1) The streak was dead when I started posting, but right after that more people saw that there was some activity and posted their stuff too. Feeling like an inspiration motivated me hugely - for about a week. Then everyone dropped out again and I was the only person posting. After that there never was more than 2 posts a day - which was very rare as you can see to your right. Now I've been the only one writing for a long time and while it doesn't bother me that much I still hoped that more people would join. I don't feel entirely alone here (I know some of you will read this), but it just isn't a huge motivation being the only regular poster here.
2) Most days I write without aim. I just want to get the work done and that is killing the spirit of it. In order to write something worthwhile you need to have what others might call 'vision'. Something to aim for. While I write this I aim to create a text that explains my departure from the streak.club and it makes writing so much easier and so much better. In my experience, doing something just that you can put the cross on your tick-off list can be a good enough start to get the body used to this new activity. However if the mind just aims to get the task over with (as opposing to getting it done), this can become very demotivating. Sadly this is what my writing has become over the last weeks. If you've followed my entries you know that I followed some stories for a few days, or picked up old ones to add some details, but that after that I lost focus and went back to just mainly journaling. I am simply not good at going somewhere without a goal, because I am a thinker. Not trying to sound arrogant here - quite the opposite actually - it's just a fact that I think a lot and while this is ok most of the time, I tend to panic when I have too much time to over-think things. So when I work too long on something without knowing the direction I freak out and am likely to quit entirely, which is what's happening right now. I don't see a point in writing daily at the moment, so I will stop and start again when I feel like it.
This will definitely not be the end of my writing, because writing has always been a part of my life. I'll just continue when I've found something to write about.
Cheers and see you around, guys!
P.S.: I feel proud about this submission :)
Wrote the concept for an app I want to make
Wrote a little review about Telltale's "Game of Thrones"
I started my explanation on why I'm leaving the streak club. It will be published here.
Some philosophy and some comedy. Really didn't feel like writing today.
More "comedy". I'm not good at this so far
Tried to write comedy again
Wrote a short review of "Le petit prince" in German
I wrote about the deception of memories
I wrote a short review about "In the Heart of the Sea"
I wrote more about productivity
I wrote something about motivation and productivity
Wrote a short story about some pirates.
Started a little story about a man inside the head, who composes our dreams
I wrote down some thoughts about my girlfriend, about love and about the purpose of words.
Tried comedy, but wrote mostly about boobs.
Tried comedy again.
Wrote something motivational about myself
Tried to write comedy again
I tried to write comedy again.
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